silent letter(s) to You

buzzed you today.. and that is a real big step forward for an acclaimed narcissist like me.. buzzed you today, coz of your telling me off about it the other day.. about me not buzzing unless you do.. i did.. mustered up enough to put my pride aside and type those two alphabets..

i thought i have so many stuffs to tell you.. so many absolutely mundane stuffs with which you have to be no way related.. but i just wanted to tell you.. and so i buzzed you.. thought that i will be gradually able to take it forward from those two initial letters.. but not much luck there.. i chocked.. i felt being constricted.. couldn't even look at my phone for sometime after that.. so much so that i wanted to feel you, that very desire of longing for you shove me away from you.. and i couldn't say anything.. and you telling me that you're studying acted just as the favourite catalyst to boost up my retreat.. all the more..

i haven't been really alright for the past lot of days.. since the last time that you saw me, to be very precise.. a lot of unwarranted stuffs happened.. and still happening.. and you know, sometimes it gets real hard to be the rock solid strong demenoured one throughout.. and maybe, i might just be breaking down momentarily.. i know i will be alright, absolutely no second thoughts about that.. but, i just felt, if i could speak to you, it will all be alright for me.. but i couldn't.. and it still ain't alright for me..

i miss you.. 

xoxo



#PseudoAlsi